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IBM's new computers may change how we process big data Very Funny!

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
What do you mean $300 million won't get me the two supercomputers I need?

SCIENTIST #1:
You're generating too much data. There isn't enough bandwidth for it all to go through.

DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
I don't understand. You're the supercomputer company, make it happen!

SCIENTIST #2:
No, it's not that. Look, each day the world generates 2.5 billion gigabytes of data. Honestly, processing it is the simple part. The hard part now is moving it to and from the chip.

DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
Can you explain it to me like I'm a child?

SCIENTIST #1:
Imagine that you run some water through a generator, like a hydroelectric dam. Building and running a dam is the easy part, it's the miles and miles of waterways each side to move the water -- that's the problem.

DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
So the issue is that there's too much water to move efficiently.

SCIENTIST #2:
Bingo.

DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
So how do we fix it?

SCIENTIST #2:
That's the problem. We can't.

DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
Then I'm just gonna have to take this $300 million somewhere else.

The DOE REPRESENTATIVE gets up to leave, just then, SCIENTIST #3 turns around in his chair to face the audience. Except it's not a scientist, but DON DRAPER from popular TV series Mad Men.

DON DRAPER:
Wait. What if you didn't have to move the water at all?

There is a STUNNED SILENCE.

DON DRAPER picks up a WHITEBOARD MARKER, gets up, and begins scribbling on the wall.

DON DRAPER:
What if we created something called "Data Centric Computing," that, rather than pumping information in and out of supercomputers, we put the processing power into the data itself.

SCIENTIST #2:
But that's impossible.

DON DRAPER:
Think about it. If we put computing power on every stage of the process, then we won't have to move the data at all. It'll be like putting a tiny hydroelectric dam on every river in the country. That's how you get the power you need.

DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
Make it happen. I want one in the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory and one in the Oak Ridge National Laboratory by 2017.

The DOE REPRESENTATIVE hands over a check for $300 million. The SCIENTISTS sit, open mouthed in admiration. DON DRAPER goes over to the cabinet and fixes himself a large glass of Woodford Reserve, no ice.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 工作学习 / 科技领域杂谈 / IBM's new computers may change how we process big data Very Funny!
    本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    What do you mean $300 million won't get me the two supercomputers I need?

    SCIENTIST #1:
    You're generating too much data. There isn't enough bandwidth for it all to go through.

    DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    I don't understand. You're the supercomputer company, make it happen!

    SCIENTIST #2:
    No, it's not that. Look, each day the world generates 2.5 billion gigabytes of data. Honestly, processing it is the simple part. The hard part now is moving it to and from the chip.

    DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    Can you explain it to me like I'm a child?

    SCIENTIST #1:
    Imagine that you run some water through a generator, like a hydroelectric dam. Building and running a dam is the easy part, it's the miles and miles of waterways each side to move the water -- that's the problem.

    DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    So the issue is that there's too much water to move efficiently.

    SCIENTIST #2:
    Bingo.

    DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    So how do we fix it?

    SCIENTIST #2:
    That's the problem. We can't.

    DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    Then I'm just gonna have to take this $300 million somewhere else.

    The DOE REPRESENTATIVE gets up to leave, just then, SCIENTIST #3 turns around in his chair to face the audience. Except it's not a scientist, but DON DRAPER from popular TV series Mad Men.

    DON DRAPER:
    Wait. What if you didn't have to move the water at all?

    There is a STUNNED SILENCE.

    DON DRAPER picks up a WHITEBOARD MARKER, gets up, and begins scribbling on the wall.

    DON DRAPER:
    What if we created something called "Data Centric Computing," that, rather than pumping information in and out of supercomputers, we put the processing power into the data itself.

    SCIENTIST #2:
    But that's impossible.

    DON DRAPER:
    Think about it. If we put computing power on every stage of the process, then we won't have to move the data at all. It'll be like putting a tiny hydroelectric dam on every river in the country. That's how you get the power you need.

    DOE REPRESENTATIVE:
    Make it happen. I want one in the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory and one in the Oak Ridge National Laboratory by 2017.

    The DOE REPRESENTATIVE hands over a check for $300 million. The SCIENTISTS sit, open mouthed in admiration. DON DRAPER goes over to the cabinet and fixes himself a large glass of Woodford Reserve, no ice.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • IBM的前世今生。


      • Are you serious?
        • I'm not just serious, but curious too。那天看到IBM字样时也很shock。回头想想也有可能喔。毕竟是一类商用机器嘛。
          • May be true like Nokia Toilet paper manufacturer turned cell-phone company. 【toilet paper】!
            • Maybe it will survive as a toilet tissue manufacturer in the end. Will see. LOL.
              • They will be back!
      • 说明IBM是拥有光荣的革命传统地
        • 当然,看看IBM的这个非常有革命传统的产品:
    • Like my ex-boss always says, think outside of the box.
    • [I don't understand. You're the expert, here is the money! make it happen! ] "I will be thrilled if some one talk to me like that !"
    • 科学史上这样的事多的是。没有听说过野生动物园的故事?
      • 讲讲!!
    • [精华]
      • make it happen!
    • 15年前我的硕士论文是 parallel inductive logic programming:在distributed large data sets的前提下,如何快速的identify and extra pattern...解决方案是在数据所在的位置就地处理,每台机器并行交换每一段的各自学习结果,也就是:processing 跟着数据跑。
      也就是,我的idea比这个提早了15年?
      • I don't understand. You're the expert, here is the money! make it happen! LOL!
        • aha. someone explained OpenPOWER Foundation
    • 这不就是今天Big Data的概念么?一切都是从google的三篇白皮书开始的,2003年的GFS,2004年的MapReduce,2006年的BigTable