聊一聊 or just having lunch together is not enough for you to understand him as thoroughly as possible. If I were you, I would not consider marrying him at this point.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-21(#3093309@0)
Have you ever been invited to his house? Has he ever introduced you to his family or close friends or his social cirlce? Those are good indicators whether men are really in love with you or not.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-21(#3093318@0)
yes.He has to realize the future life is about you and him together. You are the only one to walk through the world to death with him, not anybody else. Kids will grow up and have their own life. As parents , even he loves his kids without condition, they won't do the same. They will and shall spend their life with someone else when grow up. By then, he will be the one suffer.
-jm222(奔来眼底);
2006-7-20{376}(#3092286@0)
I have to say sth. Back home, 20's already married even had a kid, after divorce, already 30's40's. but the guys only want vergin, never married, oror at least no kid. If we have a good caree, they think we are not easy to control. how you want chinese woman find chinese guy? Don't think F want white guy, just no choice.
-cristina(cristina);
2006-7-20{176}(#3091122@0)
I understand what you said. Older age local Canadians have values closer to us, and they still behave as the old style gentlemen we saw on the old movies -- isn't that the definition of gentleman in girl's mind?My suggestion is: follow your heart. His age and daughter are not a problem if you really love each other. This is just a start, find out more about him: do you have the same view for family, kids, money, ... If you really love him, why not?
-ruoer(乡下人);
2006-7-20{241}(#3091000@0)
I think you are right. It is because of his manner and his attitude that makes me feel so good.Also, we have similar point of views in many aspects, similar value system. I just cannot believe I would fall in love with an old man, a canadian man. We have distinct background, distinct culture. Everything just seems impossible. I think I need more time to talk to him, need more to be convinced.
Thank you so much for your understanding.
-rejoices(honouroflove);
2006-7-20{344}(#3091034@0)
full of illusions，这是贱的条件之一。
-skywriting(天书);
2006-7-20(#3091145@0)
Full of prejudice, 这是蠢的条件之一
-ruoer(乡下人);
2006-7-20(#3091165@0)
他要是莫多克，我就不说你了。。。。
-maplew2008(call me at 911);
2006-7-20(#3091048@0)
forgot one more pointand it is a very important point.
I will be careful with a guy who is over 40 but claims he love someone like crazy. a man who says so is either immature or telling a lie.
A man at this age has too much distractions -- career, finance, family responsibility, etc.
a woman is only a small part of his world. how can he be crazy?
and if a woman is indeed the center of his world then he will be a useless loser.
-the_dumb_one(dumb_and_dumber);
2006-7-20{416}(#3091064@0)
Thanks for your advices.He is not making as much money as I am. But he has much saving. I believe money is not a problem if we are together.
We also talked about sexual life. He is an athelete, and so do I. So I guess we would have much more fun than average people.
About the crazy part, sounds right. So I will talk to him.
Thanks again!
-rejoices(honouroflove);
2006-7-20{322}(#3091941@0)
He is an athelete, and so do I. ???
-btflyer(从至);
2006-7-21(#3093283@0)
Lao D, you cannot compare that way, it's about feeling, feeling..., LZ is comfortable alreay with this guy, athelet just one point gain. don't throw brick to me co'z I don't support any chinese girl go with westerns,
-cristina(cristina);
2006-7-21(#3093426@0)
他说不爱孩子的妈妈. -- Well, He loves sex only. Don't to be a naive girl! You are 30 already. Other wise, you will be his another partner, it's just called married partner. Do you want?
-btflyer(从至);
2006-7-21(#3093294@0)
There will be no problem, if you don't think of it as a problem. Well, perhaps you need to ask him if he wants more children, as he already has one.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-20(#3091108@0)
Yes, he did say he wants one more daughter. I said I want a boy and 2 girls.
-rejoices(honouroflove);
2006-7-20(#3091947@0)
So that he wants only one more, while you want more than only one. What's his response? He agrees with you or not?
-asker(answer);
2006-7-21(#3093296@0)
I don't agree that chinese guy will lose, I did see some chinese guy very inteligent, have deept thinking about life/career, that's kind of very charming compared to western guys, at least to me.
-cristina(cristina);
2006-7-21(#3093319@0)
Absolutely, how many decent western guys have Chinese women as their wives?
-asker(answer);
2006-7-21(#3093359@0)
This man is 50 years old, nenver married and probably don't have a live-in g/f either. How TH did he satisfy his sexual needs all thses years ? Either he is a player or he frequently uses sex workers.
-t0r0nt0(w0lf);
2006-7-20(#3091735@0)
Under the circumstances that he is REALLY in love with LZ, though. At this point, I haven't seen it yet. "I like you" or "I am crazy about you" are not literally equal to "I love you" by western standard.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-21(#3093350@0)
To:Rejoices: NOT EASY! Take your time get to know him more, it is too earlier to discuss whether you can be with him, marriage might not be what he is looking for though he loves you...
-smartest(飘);
2006-7-21(#3094975@0)
It is hard to tell who 玩腻了 who.
-hipacific(crystalblue);
2006-7-23(#3097912@0)
I am a so called western guy, my wife is originally from Shanghai we are happliy married. Our age is very close...I don't understand some people on this topic, if the girl is happy why would you call her stupid or crazy, I personally think you people are just jealous and incompetant, basically..some of you have to wake up and realize that you are in the year 2006 not 1800's.....maybe the guy is older but love see's no age, race or financial status.
-johnnywestern(Johnny);
2006-7-22{342}(#3096672@0)
Johnny, a) girls from Shanghai are usually different, good or bad, than those from rest of China; b) Your ages are close; c)Q - can you tell us if you know Chinese language / characters, to a certain degree?LZ, what Johnny said - 'love see's no age, race or financial status' -- is true in theory but not necessarily in practice. Their ages are close. Yours are different and I agree with most posts here emphasing this.
-wukongjj(不怕做不到就怕想不到);
2006-7-23{216}(#3096995@0)
I don't agree that " girls from Shanghai are usually different", and I think that all girls, from Shanghai or not, from USA or not, white or not, Chinese or not, basically dream to be happily ever after.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-23(#3097873@0)
If it is nothing to do with western or chinese, why is the cross-cultural divorce rate much higher? I believe that human beings are born with cultural identifications.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-24(#3099292@0)
yes as a matter of fact I have learned some chinese because I care about my wife's culture and I find it fasinating, I can also write some words...it is a matter of choice,and I want to learn it.....
-johnnywestern(Johnny);
2006-7-23(#3097964@0)
TO 楼上的johnnywestern： You will never understand chinese cultrue and chinese man because you are stupid. I wonder why this jerk comes to here. 哪儿来的傻冒儿在这瞎搀和，让你老婆帮你翻译翻译我这句话。
-mjq32(枫叶蘅芜(他));
2006-8-6(#3126896@0)
A 50 years old native guy, working whole life, still at a lower position than a chinese new comer lady. Jealous because of this guy??? That is funny.
-dennis2000(dennis2000);
2006-7-23(#3097073@0)
Definitely, some white guys assume that they are supposed to be envied just because they are white. Come on, this is the 21 century
-asker(answer);
2006-7-23(#3097867@0)
i don't expect anyone to envy me, I won't speak for all western people but some of you have such a hatred for western people it makes me sick....why can't you just except the fact that u are in Canada and I respect you and you respect me,I can speak chinese and write it a little, I don't disrespect Asian people so don't disrespect or criticize me beacause I am Western........Maybe you are in the wrong country have you ever heard of muticulturism...please!
-johnnywestern(Johnny);
2006-7-23{318}(#3097962@0)
By saying that means you did not understand the above posts very well. It is nothing to do with "western" or chines guy.If the guy is excellent, I will absolutely encourage the lady to love him, why not? But from her post, I can not see any merits about him. No matter he is a chinese or western guy.
-dennis2000(dennis2000);
2006-7-23{180}(#3098342@0)
What's your definition of "excellent", though? Different people have different opinions in this regard. "Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder."
-asker(answer);
2006-7-24(#3099265@0)
except or accept?
-sammy(211 days);
2006-7-24(#3099297@0)
If that girl is purely happy and absolutely sure, she won't give us this question at all. How can you be sure that he is really in love with her by just "talking or having lunch" together?
-asker(answer);
2006-7-23(#3097858@0)
爱情 perhaps 跟种族 不大关联, but somehow 跟 金钱 关联. Western guys care about 金钱, social status and family backgrounds as well, if not more than Chinese.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-24(#3099320@0)
Sorry, there must be something wrong with this thread. This reply is to "非也非也，东方女性的温柔是会让很多国人白人情网深陷的。爱情真的跟种族金钱不大关联。 -wangyuyanrl(Xiaobao); 02:19 (#3098672@0)Reply "
-asker(answer);
2006-7-24(#3099325@0)
johnnywestern: What we are talking about right here has nothing to do with multiculturalism or Asian hatred toward western guys something like that. We simply worry about this girl not because she got a western guy,but because she and we are not sure if that guy is good for her in terms of personality not ethnicity.
-asker(answer);
2006-7-24{102}(#3099340@0)
TO 楼上的johnnywestern：
You will never understand chinese cultrue and chinese man because you are stupid.
I wonder why this jerk comes to here. 哪儿来的傻冒儿在这瞎搀和，让你老婆帮你翻译翻译我这句话。
-mjq32(枫叶蘅芜(他));
2006-8-6(#3126445@0)